He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
