So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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