Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
so explain again why im purple
no
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
