Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
