I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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