i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize