my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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