He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Maybe he injected his testicle?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
