So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just cut my nipple shaving
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
