I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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