remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
God, I missed his penis.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
