The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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