Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
