so explain again why im purple
no
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
