Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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