Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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