guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
