MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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