there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
