Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
