is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
