He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
