he told me I talked like a deaf person
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
