Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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