Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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