I want to have your abortion
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Randomize
