I got chris browned last night
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
