Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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