It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Operation Purity has been aborted
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
