I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
