yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize