he shaved USA in his pubs
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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