I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
