Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize