she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
