My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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