he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
