Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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