Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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