i think i have two assholes
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
