There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
