So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize