is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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