so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize