Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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