I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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