i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize