I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
they're like a gay fantastic four
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
