I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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