well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
