Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize